The Blissful Abyss

What Now?

A Look into the Decisions We Make.

Have you ever thought about how much the decisions we make affect our lives? Have you ever made the decision to go out with friends on a night you were originally planning to lay low? Have you ever decided not to go out with friends on a night when you originally wanted to? What about the decision to drive after a few beers because 'you're not drunk, only buzzed'. What about giving into peer pressure and experimenting with drugs you never wanted to experience. 

Making the smallest decision can have the biggest impact on who we become and what future decisions we will make. 

As an eighth grader, I made the decision that I was going to play college basketball. I knew it would be a lot of hard work but I also knew that I loved basketball and this was something I truly felt was the right course for me. As a senior in high school, I committed to play basketball at a division two school in Eastern Tennessee. I am originally from Elgin, Illinois, a suburb in the Chicagoland area. 

Eleven hours. That was the distance from my home to my decision. 

One hour. That was the distance from the nearest major city to my decision. 

Thirty minutes. That was the distance from the nearest grocery store to my decision. 

Being from the Chicago area, I grew up in a city. I grew up in an area of convenience.  I grew up in an area that was fast paced and filled with people from all walks of life. 

My decision to move eleven hours to attend school in Eastern Tennessee took me to a town of 3,000, 1,100 of which were students. My decision took me into a beautiful backwoods town in the heart of Appalachia, surrounded by more mountains than people. I did not comprehend the impact that decision would have on me a as a person. I did not understand that moving eleven hours from my family and from my friends would create holes in my heart and soul that could not be filled by the scenery, albeit beautiful, that surrounded me. 

I realized very early that I would not graduate from my decision in Eastern Tennessee. I realized very early that I had not fully thought out a decision that would impact who I was so tremendously. I realized very early that I had more decisions to make. 

After my freshman year, I made the decision to transfer and commit to continue playing basketball at Northern Kentucky University. 

Five hours. That was the distance from my home to my new decision. 

Ten minutes. That was the distance from the nearest major city to my new decision. 

Two minutes. That was the distance from the nearest grocery store to my new decision. 

My decision to transfer changed my life. I was able to play basketball for a very successful division two program, which in my senior year made the transition into the division one arena. I met people that have become my very best friends. I met the man I have been dating for the past three and half years. I graduated from college. I accepted my first post-graduate job that turned into a career. 

I realized after about one year, that I had made a great decision. I made a decision to align my surroundings with what was comfortable and familiar, while still being new and exciting. I made the decision to move closer to home, family, friends, and civilization. My decision changed my life. 

Now here's the kicker:

Had I not made the decision to attend a school in Eastern Tennessee where I spent an unhappy year, would I have ended up at Northern Kentucky where I spent six unbelievably happy years?

Our decisions, good or bad, shape who are as individuals and influence who we become as people; mind, body, and soul. It is important to understand that fact and understand that bad decisions can turn into good decisions. But to also understand a decision that we may initially think will lead us in the right direction, may not.